Max’s mother, Karla Begley, 44, is in a wheelchair with multiple sclerosis. She says her family was horrified by the autism letter.
Canada responds with compassion after autism letter outrages nation
Brenda Millson received this letter in her mailbox Friday. The autism letter was written by a neighbour.
Read the autism letter that accompanies this column. Does it make you mad? Good. That’s a sign you’re a normal person with a functioning moral compass.
The person who wrote the autism letter, the one that Brenda Millson of Newscastle, Ont. found in her mailbox Friday, is not a normal person and their moral compass is clearly on the fritz.
Millson is the grandmother of Max, a 13-year old autistic child who lives in Oshawa, Ont. with his parents and visits regularly. Upon receiving the letter she immediately called the police.
Who wouldn’t? The typed letter was clearly written by someone unhinged. Here are a few excerpts:
“You selfishly put your kid outside everyday and let him be nothing but a nuisance and a problem to everyone else with that noise polluting whaling he constantly makes,” the letter reads. “That noise he makes when he is outside is DREADFUL (sic) !!!!!!!!!!
“We have a nature trail!! Let him run around those places and make noise,” the letter continues. “Crying babies, music and even barking dogs are normal sounds in a residential neighborhood!!!!! He is NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
But the worst part of the letter was the advice to “do the right thing and move or euthanize him.”
Judging by the tempest unleashed on my social media network and the amount of coverage afforded the letter by my profession, Canadians are outraged.
Calgary comedian and mother of an autistic child, Lori Gibbs. Photo: Lori Gibbs.
But Lori Gibbs - Calgary comedian, friend of the Beacon and mother of an autistic teenager – hit just the right note in her reaction to the autism letter writer: Yes, we understand if you hate the crazy mother who wrote the letter. But someone with that much bile has her own problems.
“Somehow, she has missed learning the Golden Rule; she never heard the story of walking in someone else’s shoes for a mile; she hasn’t been shown nor has learned empathy,” Gibbs says.
Then, perhaps recalling her own experiences as a mother of an autistic child, she calls on people to do that right thing.
“Reacting to her with hate is an emotional response and I understand it,” she said. “But I sincerely believe every human needs understanding and love, her included. Don’t let the hate grow. Use it as an opportunity to teach instead. Whether we see the results or not, love always wins.”
13-year old Max Begley. Photo: Facebook.
The autism letter about Max reminds us that the stupid, the narcissistic and the not-quite-criminally-insane will always be with us. Read the Beacon News political section if you don’t believe me.
(Ok, that was a cheap shot. Most politicians are well-intentioned and work hard for their constituents – and I’m not just saying that because civic elections are only a few months away and the Beacon is pimping for campaign advertising.)
Gibbs’ response is the one we hope all Canadians would have. And so far, it seems love has conquered all.
A large group of about 120 neighbours and supporters gathered in front of Millson’s house to show their support – presumably in plain sight of the letter writer. Pundits and editorialists have condemned the letter. And Canadians everywhere seem to have agreed that compassion, not enmity, is the correct riposte to the neighbour.
Think of that letter as a stress test for our national soul. I think we passed.
Tell us what you think of the Canadian oil sands by filling out this brief survey. $2 will be donated to breast cancer research for every completed survey.